“Don’t trust a profile pic. Not even your own.”

—Rule for my unborn son

“Congratulations.
You’re now as much of a computer expert as you’ll ever need to be. And just few pages from now, we’ll show you how to put your newfound skills to use.”

—39 pages of Macintosh advertisement

“Disappointed to discover that @cause is not followed by @effect. C’est la vie…?”

—Twitter

“Chupa Chups logo was designed by Salvador Dali in 1969.”

—Realy?

“Action is the foundational key to all success.”

—Pablo Picasso

“It’s not how many followers you have, it’s who follows you.”

—Matthew Yglesias

“I still think 1990 was 10 years ago.”

—2012

“Everything in this room is eatable, even I’m eatable! But that is called “cannibalism,” my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies.”

—Willy Wonka

“All together” is written separated and “separated” is written all together.”

—Random fact #246

“Can we just smoke weed and cuddle naked? Then fuck? Then cuddle more, and order pizza?”

—Yeah

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”

—Neale Donald Walsch

“The most difficult thing about school is not homework or test but actually giving a fuck.”

—Zach Galifianakis

“I never read, I just look at pictures.”

—Andy Warhol